Religious trauma is a common experience for individuals who have been victims of spiritual abuse.
January is Spiritual Abuse Awareness Month. For more about spiritual abuse, check out this post.
In today’s post, we’re going to take a look at religious trauma. What is religious trauma? Is it the same as “church hurt”? How does religious trauma impact people? What resources or sources of support are available for religious trauma survivors?
Trauma and the Nervous System
To understand religious trauma, we must first understand trauma. The first thought that comes to mind for many people when they hear the word “trauma” may be related to military deployment or childhood abuse. However, trauma is more about the response of an individual’s nervous system than about a specific event.
I like to define trauma as anything that is too much, too soon, too fast, or lasts for too long for an individual person’s nervous system. This is why two people can have the same experience, and one of them moves on with little to no impacts while the other may experience intrusive thoughts, mood changes, nightmares, or a variety of other trauma responses.
Even things that might generally be considered “good” can be traumatic. Imagine someone who loves running. They are forced to run for days on end without preparation. This thing they enjoy becomes something that has gone on for too long, likely leaving them feeling drained of all resources to cope. This can land as trauma in their nervous system.
Defining Religious Trauma
So, what is religious trauma?
From Reclamation Collective and Religious Trauma Institute:
“Religious trauma is the physical, emotional, or psychological response to religious beliefs, practices, or structures that overwhelm an individual’s ability to cope and to return to a sense of safety.”
Notice the mention of the impact on the nervous system – “overwhelm an individual’s ability to cope and to return to a sense of safety.” The person is unable to utilize coping skills, to rely on the support of others, or to experience an internal sense of being safe.
Religious trauma can be in response to religious beliefs, practices, or structures. What does that mean?
Religious structures are the ways that a particular church, group, or religious organization is set up. This may include things like the leadership hierarchy, the membership requirements, and the policies on handling finances or discipline within the group. Religious practices are the things that church or group members do to show their commitment. Practices may include things like prayer, reading Scripture, fasting, or attending services. Beliefs are the specific tenets or foundational truths that a religious group holds to. Religious beliefs include things such as the origin of humanity, the meaning of life, and the role of a higher power.
The trauma responses that are seen with religious trauma include physical, emotional, and psychological responses. Religious trauma survivors may experience physical reactions to reminders of their religious belief system. Survivors may have difficulty regulating emotions – either feeling extreme sensitivity to things or experiencing a numbness and disconnection from emotions. The mental health of many religious trauma survivors is impacted, leading to experiences of anxiety, depression, or a variety of other trauma-related responses.
I would also add social responses to the impacts of religious trauma, as many survivors are left feeling isolated and alone. Often, these individuals experienced their trauma within a social group where they found meaning and belonging. This creates social and betrayal trauma. Then, it is common for survivors to be shunned, excommunicated, or forgotten by other members of their church or group, despite being told they were specially connected because of their shared beliefs.
Not Just “Church Hurt”
The social trauma can continue when a survivor attempts to share their experience with someone and is met with a comment such as the following:
“Well, that’s people, not God.”
“Everything happens for a reason, and God won’t give you anything more than you can handle.”
“You’re being refined for something bigger.”
“Oh, it’s just a little church hurt. We’ve all had it.”
Religious trauma is real! Church hurt and religious trauma are not the same!
“Church hurt” is a term that can appropriately apply to the possible impacts of interacting with other humans. In a setting such as a church, where you have a variety of different ages, personalities, and interests, it’s likely someone may say or do something that hurts your feelings. This type of one-off experience could be described as “church hurt” and generally doesn’t have long-term impacts on the individual.
The harmful events and actions that lead to religious trauma are not one-off experiences of interacting with other humans. Harm includes the deliberate misuse of power to inflict emotional or spiritual wounds on a person. Harm is those things that go on for long periods of time – repeated calls for confession, multiple mandatory meetings with leaders, years of grooming for relationships or “calling.” These are the things that can have long-term impacts, going far beyond an experience of church hurt, and leading to religious trauma.
Religious Trauma is Complex Trauma
Religious trauma may not be recognized within the context of what is typically considered trauma in the US. This is true both among the population at-large, as well as among many mental health professionals who must rely on certain diagnostic criteria to provide therapy services (especially when working within health insurance requirements). Many therapists agree that the rigid criteria for trauma that is currently in use within US healthcare leaves a lot of folks without access to accurate understanding, diagnosis, or support.
Religious trauma is complex trauma.
I’m going to say that again – religious trauma is complex trauma. While many of the commonly known manifestations of post-traumatic stress or PTSD are often present with religious trauma, specific complex trauma indicators show up as well. PTSD symptoms that often show up with religious trauma include:
- Intrusive thoughts, memories, or dreams about the events.
- Physiological reactions to reminders of the events. The immediate panic when a survivor drives by a church building, the sense of tension in their chest when a particular song plays – those are the body reacting to traumatic reminders.
- Avoidance of reminders. This may include not attending events where members of their former group are present. For me, this meant avoiding the side of town where my abuser lived for almost 2 years after I was out of the situation for fear of crossing paths with him.
- Changes in mood and thinking. Those impacted by religious trauma may have difficulty feeling happy or content. They may blame themselves for what happened or question if they should return to the group/church. They may lose interest in things that they typically enjoy. They may feel more irritable than normal.
- Reckless behavior. When someone is left feeling that they’ve lost their life purpose or that nothing matters, it’s easy to act in ways that may put them or others at risk.
- Hypervigilance. This is a clinical term to describe that feeling of always being alert or “on edge.” Religious trauma survivors often find themselves ready for the other shoe to drop or for the shit to hit the fan at any moment.
- Problems with concentration and sleep.
Complex trauma occurs when multiple traumatic experiences that happen over time. This is common with religious trauma – it is rarely a one-time occurrence, and generally occurs over months or years. Abuse that occurs within relationships is more likely to result in complex trauma, or cPTSD, than other types of abuse. Religious contexts are almost always built on relationships, and sometimes include requirements that relationships within the religion be a person’s only relationships. Finally, complex trauma occurs when a person is held captive in some way. Rigid religious doctrines and leadership hierarchies are definitely capable of leaving individuals feeling like they can’t leave, that they are held captive within the religious system.
In addition to the common PTSD symptoms mentioned above, those who have experienced complex trauma also tend to deal with:
- Additional difficulties with emotion regulation. Coming from a context where you weren’t allowed to feel your emotions, where only certain emotions were acceptable, or where you were responsible for others’ emotions can make it quite difficult to regulate your own emotional experience.
- Poor self-concept. This refers to the way a person views and understands themselves. Experiences of trauma within relationships alter one’s view of self. This can leave a person feeling unworthy or unlovable. Because religious trauma often also includes messages about one’s worth and threats of eternal punishment, this type of trauma can destroy a person’s self-concept.
- Relational difficulties. Multiple traumatic experiences within the context of trusted relationships, such as those that might occur within a religious group, can leave a survivor of religious trauma with a variety of relationship difficulties. This can range from not knowing how to have a romantic partnership to being unsure of who to trust. Some survivors find themselves drawn into other abusive relationships or groups in an effort to find connection. Many folks with religious trauma have little experience with what healthy relationships between equals look like.
Religious trauma is complex trauma. The impacts show up in many of the same ways that other post-traumatic stress might. Survivors of religious trauma are also frequently left questioning their purpose and life’s meaning, while navigating difficulties with emotion regulation, a poor view of self, and struggles in a variety of relationships.
The experiences of religious trauma are complex. The impacts of religious trauma are complex.
Finding Support
Did this post resonate with you? Maybe it describes your experience? Maybe it provides some insight into the experience of someone you care about? Whether you’re looking for more information, or seeking support for yourself or someone else, below are some helpful resources.
For Survivors
Working with a mental health professional who understands religious trauma can be an invaluable part of healing. This may include individual therapy, as well as participating in groups with other survivors of religious / spiritual harm.
- Therapy with me – I offer both individual and group therapy for adults in North Carolina focused on healing from spiritual abuse and religious trauma. Learn more about my services here. Learn more about the Wounded By Faith virtual therapy group that I facilitate here.
- Reclamation Collective – Search the Resource Directory for a licensed therapist or other support option that best meets your needs. Check out their Support Group options – virtual, 10-week groups that often focus on specific experiences or identities.
For Mental Health Professionals
Supporting survivors of spiritual / religious harm requires a foundational understanding of complex trauma, as well knowledge about the nuances of how religious trauma can impact a person’s life. I offer NBCC-approved Continuing Education trainings on topics related to spiritual abuse and religious trauma, as well as how these experiences can intersect with other parts of life. You can learn more about these continuing education opportunities here.
For Faith Leaders
Clergy and other faith leaders are often the first person that someone comes to when they have experienced religious / spiritual harm. If you are in a leadership role in a church, religiously-affiliated group, or parachurch organization, you are in a unique position to determine how reports of abuse will be handled and to help prevent additional spiritual abuse.
I worked in vocational ministry for almost a decade prior to transitioning to my current role as a licensed mental health professional, and am in a distinct position to help support faith leaders in confronting spiritual abuse. Check out the workshops and trainings that I provide to help faith leaders and spiritual communities gain more understanding and skills in the areas of mental health, trauma-sensitive gatherings, and handling / preventing spiritual abuse. Learn more specifically about Mental Health 101 for Faith Leaders here.
For Anyone and Everyone
This Religious Trauma Resource Guide is an ever-growing compilation of resources related to spiritual abuse, religious trauma, and other spiritual/religious harm. The Guide includes all sorts of formats – books, podcasts, websites, social media, etc. – and is open to recommendations from others. I’m hoping to be able to add more resources that focus on various spiritual backgrounds and/or personal identities, so please let me know if you have any suggestions (or updates).
What is religious trauma? I hope this post has helped broaden your understanding of what is meant by this term. Stay tuned for more posts in the coming weeks for Spiritual Abuse Awareness Month, and feel free to click the “Religious Trauma” tag at the top of this blog page for older posts on related topics.
Michelle F. Moseley (she/her) is a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor in NC. She believes ALL people deserve respect, compassion, and access to mental and physical healthcare. Michelle specializes in working with survivors of religious trauma, and with those who have body image concerns, finding there is frequent overlap in these areas. She also frequently supports late-identified neurodivergent individuals as they navigate the grief and relief of a new understanding of self. You can learn more about Michelle by visiting her website at MichelleFMoseley.com or following her on Instagram – @therapy_with_michelle
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